So I talked with Angela the other night, who I’ve been thinking of ending our friends with benefits arrangement.

I wrote her an email at almost midnight, mostly because I told her I’d be contacting her this week and hadn’t yet. So I just wanted to send her a quick email to say hi and to see how she’s doing. I thought that maybe we could get together sometime next week since I wanted to keep this weekend free for practicing pick ups and getting together with my friends.

Not 10 minutes after I send her the email, I get a phone call and it’s her! Wow… I like women that are enthusiastic but that kind of freaked me out. I was getting ready to go to bed and didn’t expect anyone to call that late so she startled me.

Note to the women out there – if a guy is only communicating with you once a week (phone or email) and he sends you an email to say hi, that doesn’t mean he wants you to call him right away.

She’s very enthusiastic when she calls and explains that she’s calling so late because she just got my email and since I sent it only a few minutes before that she figured I’d still be up. She asks me about my day and my weekend, tells me about her goings on and generally seems very happy to talk to me. We joke around and have a good time just laughing and catching up but inside I’m thinking that the inevitable question will come up. Sure enough, she eventually asks, “So… when can we get together?” I was kind of dreading that question. I say something to the effect of “Why don’t we get together sometime next week?” There’s a pause on her end… and then a disappointed “Oh…OK”. She was, understandably, hoping that we’d get together this upcoming weekend, since we didn’t get together last weekend. But I don’t want to give Angela the impression that we’re dating or boyfriend/girlfriend and if we start hanging out every week, even if it’s just as friends with benefits, I think she’ll start to interpret it that way.

In some ways, I feel I’m doing the same thing to Angela that Nancy did to me, where I felt she was avoiding making a firm commitment to getting together with me. But I honestly feel it would be better for me in the long term to keep getting out there and approaching more women rather then settling for the sure thing of sex with Angela.

I’ve been dragging my feet on making a hard decision with Angela and some of you have been wondering what’s going with this. The truth is, I’m torn between two choices:

a) Cutting the sex off completely but still spending time with her as a friend
b) Cutting the sex back to an occasional, but nor regular, occurrence

Originally, I thought I wanted a) but now I’m wondering if b) would be a better option. It’s contagious to hear her enthusiasm – when we talked she asked when she would get her “next fill” of me and I guess it makes me feel good as a man that this woman is very interested in continuing to have sex with me (not to toot my own horn or anything). I think I opened up a passion inside her that was dormant for a while – and I think she’s truly happier than she was before. However, I’m not sure I’m the man to continue to keep that passion alive for her.

This is exactly what I mean when I say that I seem to attract women I’m somewhat, but not deeply, attracted to.

We left things that we would get together next week, during a weeknight, for a coffee. I should probably decide whether I want that get together to end up at my place.

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