I called her up a couple of nights ago with the intention of saying I had met someone. I wasn’t totally sure about this approach, but I thought it would be the best and easiest explanation. I didn’t want to tell her the real truth because that would be unnecessarily cruel. On the other hand, I know that she wanted us to have a relationship so I felt that telling her I had met someone that I wanted to get more serious with would also make her feel very rejected – since I’d be saying I wanted to have a relationship with someone else and not her.
Thankfully, I got her voicemail – so I left her a message (in a friendly sounding tone) and asked her to call me back. She called me back later that evening and by then I had enough time to make up my mind of what I was going to tell her when she would ask the inevitable “why?” question.
I told her that I really enjoy our times together and that I still wanted to continue doing that – but that we should stop having our sleepovers.
She asked me why (of course) and I just said I didn’t feel comfortable with our arrangement anymore. I told her that these types of arrangements usually don’t last long since it’s hard to sustain it. She asked me if I’ve been in this type of situation before. I told her I have but not often. I didn’t go into details, since that would have been pointless. I tried to sound caring but firm – I cared about her feelings but at the same time, I knew I wasn’t happy continuing it.
She said she was disappointed but I could tell she wasn’t devastated. I thought I took the right approach. She even told me to take a deep breath and relax, after sensing that I was somewhat tense telling her this. That made me feel better since it showed that she wasn’t as hurt as I feared.